The significant problems we face cannot be solved at the same level of thinking we were at when we created them. Albert Einstien
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QuoteThe significant…
Integrating the value of Water

Sun Infused Water
Life Area: Survival
Biologically speaking, water is critical for the proliferation of life. All known forms of life depend on water. How connected are you to your water source? This week notice the amount of water that is a part of your day by drinking, washing and watering. A few times this week reflect upon not having easy access to this resource. What needs of yours would not be met if you didn’t have a supply of water ?
Posted in Uncategorized
Tagged getting InTouch with Values, Value Awareness, Values, Water
School for first timers!
Preparing for fall workshops in the community I was invited to a meeting to discuss what the school Counselors would like me to present in my Parenting and Teacher getting Intouch Workshops. In this meeting I learned many possibilities for supporting parents who are getting their little one’s off to school for the first time.
Sitting now at this end of the parenting years (17 and 19 years old) and looking back I remembered how lost my children and I where entering the first time. We didn’t know we were lost!
I would like to say the first time was kindergarten yet we discovered each year and each teacher is a first time experience. Sorry parents. There are the milestones of being in elementary, moving to middle school and then up to high school. Each time is a new experience.
Lets go back to kindergarten. Even after a few years of pre-school immersion and early child focused classes, school was a huge adjustment and learning curve for all of us. Besides being able to cut, color, draw, paint and create little projects children that are attending kindergarten are now expected to be able to:
- have letter recognition,
- write letters,
- know the beginning sounds,
- have reading readiness (awareness of words going from left to right)
- be attentive and follow directions
- have polite social skills
for description of each point – go to link
Wow! My mother was a stay at home mom and these learning goals she left to the teacher. This was before kindergarten and pre-school! Wanting to be better prepared myself I did have my children in a part-time pre-school and filled their time with other learning activities like early childhood music and many socialization opportunities. We also had a full schedule of our own activities and play learning. Yet, when it came to school, we lacked the preparedness level expected of them. I discovered that I had focused upon a different set of skills and apparently so did the pre-schools!
The first ugly thing to rear its head that became a huge distraction for us was behavior. Yes parents in kindergarten. A wake up call. As a fresh new mom with beautiful and innocent children this was a nightmare and the last thing I expected. We ran into bully kids, bully parents, bully teachers, bully secretaries, bully school principals. No discrimination here! Yet they all had one thing in common. Each one was trying the best way they knew how to get their needs met.
I want to support kids in the best way I know how and that is through supporting parents, teachers and schools in finding new ways of integrating behavior awareness, that with practice, makes life easier and more fulfilling. Therefore after the requests of the above mentioned meeting and to support my current classes I have begun this series of supportive tips.
My goal focus is to present material to parents that would include the educators needs yet still include the parents perspective. As I was hearing the needs expressed from the members of the school administration I was able to discriminate my parenting needs without judgement either way. Unique, yes and it will allow a rounded outlook that includes more equality.
Parents stay in touch and find concrete solutions for supporting your children through tips and fall workshops.
Posted in Uncategorized
Tagged Behavior, Children, Education, Kindergarten, Parents, Preparedness, Schools, Teachers
Integrating the value of Shelter
Life Area: Safety
Shelter is one of the basic human needs along with food and water. It is a structure that protects you from the elements and gives you a place to live. Notice your living space this week as though seeing it for the first time. Walk through first with the intention of identifying what features bring you (or not) a sense of safety. Walk through a second time and notice what features bring you peace (or not). Walk through a third time and reflect on what you would like to change.
Posted in Uncategorized
Tagged getting InTouch Values, Shelter, Values, Values Awareness
Intimacy in relationships
Intimacy in relationships begins with an experience! Intimacy begins with tenderness in our skill of listening and ability for reflecting back. It is our willingness to hear and not to only be heard.
- How many of us want to be held and touched tenderly by our lovers?
- Why would our conversations be any different?
- Can you remember a time when the tender kindness that went into your intimate touch was matched in your conversation with your lover? When that tenderness is not in the conversation do you imagine them as your lover in that moment?
- When was a time that you both shared anything with each tenderly and felt accepted exactly as you are?
I believe it is more important to create an experience of intimate connection in conversation first before mastering the correctness of how to speak to each other. Ever coach a couple only to hear one partner tell the other how it’s done? Intimacy maker? No! If you forget how it should be done and have the experience of intimate connection you are more apt to take chances, be creative and develop your courage to tell each other what really matters. This is when I experience couples commit to keep trying to hear what is meaningful in what the other person is trying to share. If you have to learn how to do it and get it right first, before the connection, it tells me that you are feeling frightened and need the safety of being right and getting your way at the expense of your partner.
Therefore with couples the primary focus is to walk them through a dialogue dance that isn’t focused on how to do it. It is focused on doing it and accepting whatever arises so that it is easy for them to feel heard and understood. This is when they feel safe to share important issues.
Each partner is being coached to make the dialogue about themselves to translate each story they bring up into being about themselves and never staying in the habit of making it about the other person. Talk is slowed down so that each partner can reflect and that the dialogue is never one-sided. It means pausing to connect to what is being said before bringing up other issues so that both have a say.
It definitely isn’t for the faint hearted. It is for couples wanting to work on their intimacy, vulnerability and grow their relationships to bring warm loving kindness and spiciness back into the experience.
This week I had an opportunity to stand beside and guide couples into their vulnerability to the point the veil of self protection fell away. From this place of deep meaning it is one of the most tender sweet spots to find oneself in. By standers included! You are where it really matters. When couples commit to continue coming back to try and express in a way they both can be heard, isolated behavior and fear looses its power, humor develops and it becomes easier. This is when it becomes about the relationship and not about winning.
Posted in Uncategorized
Tagged Behavior, Couples, getting InTouch, Intimacy, leadership, Love, Loving Kindness in Relationships, Partners, Relationships, Vulnerability















