One aspect of becoming ‘kid free’ is the memory clips that stream by now that this parent has more time to reflect and consider past family patterns and behaviors.
A pattern that influenced us all was the choice to demand feed these babies. At the time being new parents I didn’t realize that many times these babies wanted reassurance and nurturing versus being hungry.
My regret now is not recognizing that the interactions between mom and dad had been creating an emotional need versus a physical need that led to a demand for constant snacking throughout difficult times of change. Held in check when small through food choices, however as parents separated exploded.
If I where to recommend new parents or had the opportunity to repeat this earliest stage of breast-feeding I would do things differently. I would still breast feed, however, I would set up a schedule of times for feeding and stick to it. In those moments of seeking the breast in between, I would find other was of nurturing baby! I would coach new parents on how to reassure baby through those times of tiredness and discomfort in parents resolving their unmet needs!
Renee Lindstrom, GCFP,
Feldenkrais® Practitioner since 2007, Value-Based Communication & Empathy Coach since 2004, Art of Placement since 2000, Founder of Greater Victoria Peace & Intercultural Celebrations since 2010 & Greater Victoria Labyrinths since 2012, #yyj Peace Week Calendar Founder – 2014 & 2015
Posted in Uncategorized
Tagged Breast Feeding, Demand Feeding, Diets, Eating, Emotional Eating, Families, Family Culture, Family Patterns, Nursing, Nurturing, Young Family Relationships
This is a great question:
- The focus of Inside Awareness is on learning to increase the quality of life experiences beginning inside and expanding out. Much like a drop water expands equally out on all sides. The learning practice is based upon the four aspects of self; physical, emotional, mental and beliefs which are easily translated into focused areas of personal and relationship development.
- Inside Awareness programs have been designed for early childhood to end of life, (and all stages in between!) Patterns of movement, habitual behavior and language, and lifestyles are a thread through life and are unconscious actions and reactions until a focus of attention is placed on them specifically. Learning with Inside is designed for developing this skill so something new can happen! This is to learn moving beyond conflict, pain and struggle with more awareness and ease into a space of deeper connection inside and outside.
Therefore adults, parents, children, educators, employees and employers would benefit with these learning and coaching programs.
©by Renee Lindstrom, GCFP, May, 2014
Feldenkrais® Practitioner since 2007, Communication & Empathy Coach since 2004, Art of Placement since 2000
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Posted in FAQ = Frequently Asked Questions
Tagged Awareness programs, Childhood, Educators, End of Life, Families, getting InTouch, Inside Awareness, movement awareness, Parenting, Personal Development, Relationships, Renee Lindstrom
That includes redirection and reassurance while being recognized versus, (you fill in the blanks)
- You are,
- Your doing,
- You must,
- Say your sorry!,
For example, Identify and acknowledge what is going on for them. It takes as much time as it does to get angry and use force to get your own need met. Hearing them takes less energy for all of you. It does not mean you have to let them do what it is they are doing. In fact you are teaching them to understand the feelings they are having. They cannot teach this to themselves. Such as,
“When you get angry about coming with us I bet you are wanting to stay home and play and not come to another event with your brother and I. Is that what’s going on for you?”
Now imagine the way you would habitually handle this type of situation. You may not even be aware that they are meeting their own needs by their behavior and you may perceive this as resistance and label them as being __________. Their resistance is a strategy for them to meet their needs in the only way they know how, which you may be taking personally and making it about them not listening to you. If so, consider how your reaction impacts them. How would your child process your reaction in a way that they stayed connected to their own value? What might they be feeling and who would they go to for comfort?
Now consider the reasons you may have reacted that way? Could it be the way you learned to behave based upon your experience or that you haven’t had any training on how to deal with multiple needs in the multiple relationships of your unique family?
Who do you go to to discuss your experiences of their reactions, their father perhaps? Who do they go to to discuss your reactions? Your behavior in their eyes may be exactly what they consider their behavior to be – reactive. How can their behavior be wrong and yours right?
For more info on Upcoming Parenting Workshops with Renee Lindstrom
Posted in Uncategorized
Tagged Behaviour, Families, getting InTouch, Humanity, Imagine a Child's World, Listening, Parenting, reassurance, Relationships, resistance, unique family