Tag Archives: Oneness Wednesdays

Wednesday’s April NVC Awareness Victoria doesn’t disappoint

Once again Victoria responds with interest by attending The Church of Truths Oneness Wednesdays offering of topics with a  Nonviolent Communication perspective.  Yesterday evening the topic was ‘Resolving Conflicts and presented by Michele Favarger.

Michele offered a deeper connection to the four basic steps of Nonviolent Communication; observations, feelings, needs and requests and their relationships to the first part of any dialogue – self connection.  She stressed the importance of choosing to connect to ones own personal need replacing habits of seeing others in what Marshall Rosenberg calls, ‘enemy images.’  The reference is to how we hear hard to messages being about us rather than hearing what the other persons is needing.

Michele guided last nights group through  this process with ease and humor, including personal stories on how this style of communication has supported her own changing consciousness and outcomes during her own experiences of conflict.

Judi Morin who opened April’s series introducing NVC  joined us again last night and found herself involved in a spontaneous role play with Michele resulting from an audience question that was a highlight of the evening.

Questions of where to go from here came from the audience  with request expressions of personal preferences for their own personal safety in learning.  If this interests you as well, more connection  contact information is listed below.  As a grassroots organizer for the Gandhi, King Seasons for Peace and Nonviolence and this month-long Nonviolent Communication Awareness Campaign  event together as an example of creating peace in your world, I want to acknowledge that there is a number of Victoria people offering a variety of opportunities to experience Nonviolent Communication throughout the Greater Victoria Communities that were unable to participate.  Teachings and practice groups are happening in Sidney, at two of our local Unity Churches, one in West Saanich and one in Victoria,  at a local Jewish Community Centre, at the Crystal Pool, in James Bay at New Horizons, and others in private offices such as Inside Awareness for Healthy Living and some homes to meet the needs of sharing, learning and connection.  Others are taking this into their schools and I know of some in government and professional organizations that  have intensified their NVC training to make change from within their society.  We have one local who presented an NVC theme at the United Nations in 2011!  (Marion Little shared her UN experience with us at  the showing of Heart to Lead, Women as Allies for the Greater Good)

NVC inspires people to change their world and those who connect to it long to share through teaching and practice and want others to interact with in this particular way.  Marshall Rosenberg has designed this system to go beyond right and wrong thinking and encourages it’s integration to spread outwards therefore you will find a vibrant grassroots community locally for in person meetings and on-line globally.

Last year I heard someone personally frustrated with Nonviolent Communication express  this in their own style of communication group classes that resulted in a closed statement  that ‘it didn’t work.’  I was shocked,  surprised and somewhat curious about this statement and yet knew that since beginning to practice in 2000/2001 that it can be a challenging process to integrate into everyday living.  I believe it was our own local Selinde Krayenhoff, co-founder of Island Parent Magazine in 2001/2002 who began sharing Nonviolent Communication for Parents who stated, ‘this is a lifestyle choice and a practice.’  It’s true, it is and one that I believe is more than talking about it and involves a commitment and willingness to make personal changes that results in clarity of our owning thinking process.  It can be an amazing journey into self discovery  that can lead to success in our relationships.  Yes in the learning and beginning a practice of doing NVC we may drive others a bit crazy, yet getting beyond the doing into being, they are just as rewarded as we are! Therefore folks, if you are looking for a way to improve how you do relationships whether with your boss, your employees, your parents, children or beloved this is a form of connecting that is being in relationships that improves the quality of experiencing our connectedness that leads to inner content.

Appreciation to all of you for your support, interest and attendance in coming to meet and hear more about these topics.  As promised for more can be found at:

These sites are not local, yet you may be able to get access to upcoming local events

To find out more about the getting involved locally with the Season for Peace and Nonviolence or for local activities, ideas and suggestions or the Heart to Lead, Women as Allies for the Greater Good
If you are looking for support to put on your own event from providing a complete service to a presenter, contact me for more information at renee@insideawareness.com

Social Change from an NVC Perspective

Wednesday, April 18th was Victoria’s third Nonviolent Communication (NVC) presentation to bring awareness and the benefits of NVC into our community and this nights focus was on Social Change.  April was dedicated to NVC awareness at the Church of Truth Oneness Wednesday’s and for me it was important to bring the spirit of the person that introduced this form of connecting to the planet.  A person who was social change long before there was a label for it.    Therefore the introduction began with a focus upon my perspective and understanding of Dr. Marshall Rosenberg that is based upon hearing him share his fabulous experiences.  One way Dr. Rosenberg enjoys to teach is through modelling and sharing the process (his process)  that developed and shaped his understanding and therefore his concepts.

NVC as I heard him share,  is a result of Marshall’s inner question and a passion for social change in education.  It began with his perspective based upon his cultural and education background which he took on the road and developed his own deepened conscious understanding over many years of being in the “hot seat” of experiences, being a voracious reader and connector to those initiating change in the areas of  history, cultural patterns and how humanity perceives information and connects.

Dr. Rosenberg wrote a book about his perspective of how the US educational system could better serve children’s styles of learning.  It was his belief and area of passion for social change.  Dr. Rosenberg was a psychologist and held the position of Dean at a few different university institutions in the US.  He also had his own personal practice.   All of which he gave up to become a cab driver.  Why?  He answered his own office telephone one Saturday afternoon and heard the hesitancy of the mother calling in about her son and the limitation she had of the financial burden.  Dr. Rosenberg in that moment had a need to contribute in a way people could afford with ease.

The name – Nonviolent Communication,  became the title of his method for connecting from a local community needing a title for one of his workshops.  Dr. Rosenberg took this on the road and began to travel into communities inviting him as long as they took care of the arrangements.  He would show up and give workshops, presentations and always hold separate space and time to work with individual healing of differences either in families, groups and organizations with a style of mediation and resolving conflicts.  He’s traveled throughout the world and inspired may citizens in many countries.

The connection to our community that expanded into British Columbia was through Towe Widstrand who arranged for Marshall to give workshops for our Provincial  Government Employees.  Towe has gone on to head Dr. Rosenbergs’s Eastern Countries interests.

I believe Marshall was willing to explore differences with a desire or longing for social change.  He went beyond his original opinions and perspectives and deepened his own consciousness.  Along the way he began showing those around him a bridge, one way of celebrating the differences between individuals that demonstrated going beyond the limitations of personal habitual responses.  A bridge that begins with taking personal responsibility for exploring one’s own conflicted inner emotions and identifying the sources of these emotions.  Why? In my opinion to replace the habits of automatic behavioural responses and waking up to successful ways of connecting for the purpose of moving beyond the effort of struggle, pain and conflict.

What part of social change in my life brought me to NVC – short for Nonviolent Communication?  I was on the Board of Directors of a Buddhist Dharma Centre.  I had turned to Buddhist Meditation for finding peace and inner connection and connection to others in relationships.  I had a strong connection to the environment, nature and animals, as this was where I was safe, comfortable and found the most peace.  While in this community during Retreats, Meditation trainings and practices there was an experience of expanding inner connection and connection to the environment.  During the actual practice there was an experience of loving kindness in relationships.  In the day to day operations, and relationship behaviours I began to experience it as one of the most violent relationship environments I was entrained within.  The explanation I received was the more enlighten you became, the more depth of pain you felt and therefore the deeper the violent behaviour.  This did not meet my needs for authenticity or integrity.  This led me to NVC and into a Western dogma that I could begin to practice and integrate as my comfort allowed.

My intention for the evening was to guide participants through an experience of the dance we call NVC.  My hope was of  inspiring curiosity and to motivate a deeper exploration that could be the beginning of  celebrating our differences  to see beyond enemy images, and connect at the level of our humanism – our values.

In our group sharing at the end of the evening I heard back from a participant that they felt they had an experience where by they connected to the beauty inside them.  A wonderful testimony to this method of communication!

Renee Lindstrom, passionately shares ways for connecting to the beauty with in each of us for the purpose of finding ease in connecting to ourselves and others.  She is a past director on the board of the B.C. Network for Compassionate Communication and is currently focused upon the creating local Awareness for the Gandhi, King, Chavez Seasons for Peace and Nonviolence.  Renee can be reached by email –  renee@insideawareness.com.