Finding my breath and motivation after COVID (?) has been like creating lemonade from a lemon

by Renee Lindstrom, GCFP

This spring I think I caught COVID for possibly the second time (tested negative).  It scared the hell out of me afterwards when trying to do what I love, walking.  My breathing was compromised, big time.  My lungs screamed after a few steps and I would have to wear a mask to regulate my breathing for it to stop.

I wondered what to do? 

I took out an old rebounder and got to  jumping.  I didn’t know if it would work but knew it would drain my lymph nodes at the very least.  At first I could only continue for 2 & 1/2 minutes.  Dang.  Slowly the time crept up, as breathing came easier and I was able to push through my resistance to exercising.   Each new time challenge became easier.  Ambition led to trying some other exercises which led to pulling all the muscles around the circumference my ribs.  Intercostal muscle strain meant moving carefully with no jumping or ambitious exercise for six weeks.  

I was able to transition to running on the rebounder though. I knew I didn’t want to lay down as experience has taught me if one does, one may never get up! As the minutes creeped up I asked myself, who is this? This isn’t me. Apparently it was! At some point I felt a new connection to a core energy sensation that easily disappeared as soon as I became distracted by thinking. Any inclination to think at all and the connection of sensing this core strength was gone. Thank goodness for mindfulness training. When awareness of this physical felt sensation connection started to grow I got that I was running towards my future.  I wasn’t sure what this meant only that is was exciting. When my rib muscles finally stopped hurting I started with resistance bands for upper body strength training and that’s when I began to get some understanding of what running into my future meant. I recognized this as an aspect of who I always wanted to be in my dream relationship yet never bothered to make it a priority. This COVID scare could have been a downer yet it turns out has actually turned into a great awakening of personal awareness.

Work out time has crept past 45 minutes a day and now is going towards my goal of 60 minutes. My original fear I felt about my breath has turned into an experience of running into who I choose to be and want to be when my wish fulfilled (my person) and I discover (accept) each other. I emphasize I want to be this person for myself, not them. I hope this is who they experience in me. Running into my future has become an action of manifesting and integrating my dreams as though I am that person I crave to be in a relationship. I have a new long term cycle beginning and it’s like my inner self is aligning for a deeper and more active relationship this coming year.

This COVID type experience has returned focus to my physicality and inner strength. This could be fun!

I am reminded that this is what I mentor to others. Now connecting to this dimension for manifesting dreams myself I look forward to being able to support their deeper connections to actively becoming their own intentions.

The only way to change is action

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by Renee Lindstrom

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by Renee Lindstrom, GCFP @ Inside Awareness,  Living in Natures Love Blog
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Copyright 2014 – 2023 Renee Lindstrom, GCFP

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